Suffering comes when you are not true to who you are. When you ignore your soul and listen to your head, your thinking brain.

That conditioned by others, confused by mass, sort of brain.

How do I know when I am not aligned with my source, my_Self? – I suffer.

I sink when living in the past.

I panic in the future.

I am dis-eased with unease.

-Toxic covering my soul

-But when I am ME.

I am Self, flowing with source –

In the


I am ME. Free. Omnipotent

Trusting. Certain. Confident. Me.


Emiting & receiving at once

Simultaneous Creation.

Then. I . Am. Free.

This Lifetime

I want this Lifetime to be of greatest expansion and greatest creation, than ever before.


“It’s the best it’s ever been, and even better things are coming…. It’s the greatest it has ever been, and even greater things are coming…it never ends.” _Abraham Hicks

“Don’t worry about going back. You don’t have to go back…In fact, you can’t go back, because you know too much” – A. Hicks

How to Discover & Create

Nothing sad is real.

Nothing Past is real.

Only real is real is the Now.


When I want to discover clarity and create future manifestations, this trick can help.

(Well,It’s not really a “trick”, it’s more of a tool… but we like the way “trick” feels)

-If I am stuck in a “memory” of the past that is painful – I try to identify the feeling first (fear, anger, panic) and identify it’s opposite (trust, empathy, peace) and practice that emotions vibration.

If I think I am missing someone, or wanting something, I try to identify the feeling I associate with that memory, person, image and practice the vibration of that higher feeling vibration.

This helps me identify things I want (sort out contrast) and helps give the power away form external and directs it internal and, effervescent, self sufficient, abundant pure positive energy.

For example. When I think I miss my ex and it is painful, and I feel powerless and on the low emotional vibrational scale, I try to focus in on what feeling I thought she provided in that moment (happiness, safety, validation, security), and focus that feeling in my body, reminding itself that it IS that higher vibrational emotion. That THAT is what it is missing (alignment with it’s Self). And ease more easily into that vibrational frequency, raising higher up the scale.

Another example is when I have nightmares. I have had night terrors since childhood. They would haunt my whole day and effect my rest at night. After listening to Abraham Hicks talk about “closing the (vibrational) gap” regarding nightmares I tried identifying the feeling behind the night terrors…who would of thought the felling was terror (panic) helplessness abandonment, etc behind these night terrors.

It Sounds redundant and obvious, but prior to my increasing awakening, I would analyze, analyze, and analyze the night terrors- practicing the low energy vibrational feeling and thus shaming and blaming myself as a result of the analysis on the low frequency dominant vibration.

but now I am able to identify the feeling: terror. Identify it’s opposite: Safety and find an image, time, or some conceptualization/ expression (music, show, celebrity) of that higher flying feeling vibration and practice it. over and over again, until I change topics or move up the vibrational scale.

Thank you Byron Katie. Thank You Abraham, Esther-Jerry, and world

RIP #14

I saw a post today that showed the face of a beautiful young woman and read “…14th murdered black transwoman of 2017″…. My first thought was “14?! dead transperson”- Then “14th black person… this year?! How many have there been altogether?”

I feel conditioned guilt when I say this, but a part of me feels like gay/trans/LGBTQIZ … is the new and old black.

Now that is a bold. statement. I do not mean to minimize the atrocity of the enslavements of Africans by the US… nor the discrimination and prejudices endured by those of African decent living in America.

What I do mean is that the discrimination, lack of empathy, bottom of the barrel attitude of this country is geared toward those in the LGBTQ community, and that we are the punching bag for all other minorities.

I have been set up, abused, kicked out of churches, fired, looked down upon, discriminated again, verbally berated, and bullied by all races- all minorities.

I couldn’t figure it out.. All the time my friends would say ” The weirdest things always happen to you” Or act appalled, fringing on insinuating that I made things up, when I would tell them about one of the aforementioned events.

I started to think it was all in my head. Because in my mind, if my black, latino, overweight, punk, etc friends were never treated with disdain like I was – I couldn’t be discrimination and it must be ME. I must be “bad”

It didn’t click until a former employer set me up on something so extreme that when I asked a trusted co worker what was going on, she said ” Did you ever think it’s because you’re gay?”

Bing! light bulbs lit bright everywhere. Yes. Not only am I gay. I am trans. I go by my sex pronoun, but I clearly appear “other” or “trans”.

As those bulbs lit, I remembered NO ONE congratulating me when we could get married. I was a therapist at a Reservation at the time. When the Orlando shooting occurred I asked my supervisor ( our MENTAL HEALTH EXPERT) if I could take PTO, told her I was in shock. She asked me “Why?” I told her “the Orlando shooting” she said ” Oh. I didn’t even put that together.” Months later I was in a car accident at work. I couldn’t fly out of the state the next week due to documented injuries. Work said I have a “history” of being in shock and told me they notice them accommodating me a lot and that I need to apply for disability due to my “PTSD”- I was puzzled and asked what they were referring to…. I took PTO off the day Orlando happened. And I also went to Tribal Council to press for LGBT youth groups. They told me “that doesn’t exist anymore”- three months Later I was fired, the weekend before Christmas.

**** Note. I had four EXCELLENT work reviews prior to these incidences. In fact I had one one month before I urged for LGBT Youth Groups and three months before I was fired for “misconduct.”


Then using my current job’s interview, we were in a customer service training for our medical staff. One person stated they don’t feel comfortable tx trans clients. One African American Female doctor stated ” They are against my religious beliefs but I will treat them as a patient” Then an African American Behavioral Health *** worker, stated ” Just because we work with them doesn’t mean we have to march in their parades.”

I was sitting right next to her. I thought HOW is this real? It’s 2017. ( and we are being murdered in 2017. With now outreach, support, media coverage. She did not leave us in vain.)

And how can groups like the Native Americans and African American who were (are) tortured, discriminated again, and neglected by the US government buy into hating GAYS.

The same government used their religion to board them, enslave them, beat them, discriminate, slander, and hold them down.

I get why. They are believing their thoughts.

My intent isn’t to hate or blame. My intent is to educate, to speak, to open the eyes of those who are hurting.

You are not alone.

You are not crazy.

The time to change is NOW.